Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge, Health, Faith, & Miracles

Day 24 ~ A Difficult Time in My Life…

A Difficult Time in My Life…

Well, that would have to be the day my doctor told me I had cancer.

I was going to save this story for when I shared by biopsy story but I guess now is just a good a time as any.

So it all started when I was going to this one Doctor and he said that I had high enzymes.  (Actually the nurse called me to tell me that after reading the results from a recent blood test.)  I said, “What does that mean?”  She says, “The doctor says he’ll talk to you about it at your next appointment.  Don’t worry, you’re not going to die!”  I thought that was kind of weird and odd so anyway I changed from that doctor to our family doctor where all my kids have gone since they were born and it was way more feasible because it was literally down the street from our house.

So I told him what the other doc had said, his face bore a worried look as he wanted fresh blood test ordered.  When the results came back his nurse calls and says, “Yes, the enzymes are very high and he thinks you may have a gallbladder issue.  Can you come in the hospital for an ultrasound.”  No prob.  I did that.  It turned out that I had a few masses on my liver.  One that was about 5′ another was 3′ or something like that.

So long story short, and a few CAT scans and MRI’s later he calls me into his office to give me some results.  He says flat out, “You have cancer.” and then grimaced a bit.  I just knew I didn’t hear him right.  Tears just began to stream down my face and I began to cry like a newborn baby.  He continued to ask about my family history and if anyone in my family ever had cancer.  I cry more because both my maternal and paternal grandmothers did.  My father’s mom died when she was 50 and my Mom’s mom died when she was 67 from colon cancer.

The doctor makes that face again as he stares at his computer screen.  “We just don’t know what type of cancer it is though.”  I was like… okay?  dumbfounded you know?  “It could be liver cancer or skin cancer… we just can’t be sure right now.  I’m going to refer you to a liver specialist.”  He checks over my whole entire body and question every mole I had and then said, that’s not it.

I get out to my car and sit there for a few and then call my mother because my husband was working.  Usually my hubby always goes to the doctor with me but I was going so often with all the ultrasounds and scans I figured no big deal… I’ll just let everyone know what the doc said.  Anywho… As I tell my mom, I hear her voice crack (my mother is not an emotional lady nor have I ever seen my mother cry or a tear drop from her eye!)  She ask if I can drive home.  Mind you my house wasn’t too far.  But I sat there and thought about it and I couldn’t.  I could barely move!  I call my husband and he was there to pick me up in no time.

Of course I balled my eyes out that whole day and more days to come.  My husband says, “I don’t care what the doctor says, you don’t have cancer.”  I cry harder because to me he just didn’t understand!  I was probably going to die!  Why me?  I kept asking God.  It’s so many bad people in the world and I try to do good my whole life!  Why me and not one of them?

I went to see the liver specialist and he wanted me to do another scans for him and drink stuff so they could see in my veins or something.  I didn’t want to go through all this again.  Why couldn’t he just look at the other results?  Anyway… after the specialist got his results back he couldn’t tell what kind of cancer either unless he I did a liver biopsy.

I didn’t want to do that!  I didn’t want to do anything else!  I was tired and worn out!  I just surrendered to God and was going to accept my fate whatever that may be.  I called my Pastor (which is a family member)  told him all about it.  He prayed for me and told me not to tell anyone.  So outside my family I didn’t.  I called my husband’s father because he’s a Deacon and Minister and Elder of the church… because the Bible said to call the Elder to come pray for you.  He did.  Everyone was praying for me including all my children.  My husband or kids never once said that I had cancer… they wouldn’t claim it.  I went online and printed out every healing scripture I could fine and taped it to every wall in my house! ( You know every room has 4 walls well some have smaller parts that extend out… could be a closet or whatever I put one on that wall too!)  Everytime I past it I’d say that scripture and tell my family to do the same thing.

I cry myself to sleep and when I wake up, I’m in the room alone and a bright white light is shining through my window.  So bright that it’s blinding!  I tried to look at it longer but I just felt peace as if God had healed me.  I drift back off to sleep and dreamed.  I dreamed that I was in a dark hospital room more like one for surgery.  My first doctor was there in an all white lab coat and he laughs a bit and says, “You don’t have cancer.  You just don’t have a lick of iron in your body.”  (I am also severely anemic)  So when I wake up, I tell everyone that I didn’t need to get the biopsy because God already healed me!

So my family agreed with me and we continued on with our lives until of course I had to go to the doc and he’d bug me about getting the liver biopsy.  He bugged me for a whole year that I finally went ahead and did it.  But at first I struggled with it because I didn’t know if I didn’t want to do it because I was scared to death or I felt that if I did the biopsy that meant I was telling God that I didn’t have faith in Him.

I went ahead and did the biopsy (1 year later).  I wasn’t anxious or anything to get the results back because I already knew and BELIEVED that God had healed me!  The results came back… I DID NOT HAVE CANCER!!!  What he said I did have was…

Focal nodular hyperplasia (FNH) is a benign tumor of the liver (hepatic tumor), which is the second most prevalent tumor of the liver (the first is hepatic hemangioma). It is usually asymptomatic, rarely grows or bleeds, and has no malignant potential.

Then he said, “Just keep doing whatever it is you’re doing.”  In my mind I was like, “If you people would have left me alone to begin with!  UGH!!!”

That was all a few years ago.  My oldest daughter asked me the other day if I thought that I really had cancer and God healed me or if I think maybe I never had it to begin with.

Great question!  In either scenario I know what I felt like when the doctor said those words to me. And what I know more now than ever is that MY GOD is a HEALER!!!  Rather I had cancer and he took it away OR the devil kept trying and MY GOD BLOCKED it!  That’s why they could never completely come up with, “What kind of cancer.  I know it’s cancer… I just don’t know what kind.”  WHAT kind of crap is that!? LOL

Anyway I’m Blessed and Highly Favored and this is why!

This is already super long so I’m going to make my biopsy story another blog post.  After I write it I will link it here.  If you read down this far may God Bless your heart and Heal you or a loved one if that is what you are seeking!  AMEN!

Advertisements
Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 23 ~ Pet Peeves

Pet Peeves

I know I have a lot but I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to think of them all…

  • People who see you’re blinker but won’t let you over… They won’t speed up or slow down.  They are just determined that they are not going to let you over!
  • When someone pulls out in front of me and then is going so slow I have to break.. And then when I look in back of me there are no cars behind me… They could have waited.
  • Cars that choose to get in the shorter turning lane line and then instead of continuing on in their lane they just get over in front of you… no blinkers or anything!
  • People who act like they have to come to a complete stop when turning

(Yes, It may seem that I have a bit of road rage! LOL)

  • When I’m eating and someone burps without saying excuse me. (Or any other bodily function.)
  • Watching someone eat cereal and try to talk with their mouth full and then milk drips on their chin and they act like it’s not even there.
  • Teaching kids math and you ask them to hold up 7 fingers.  They hold up one hand and two on the other and then they begin to count.  Starting with the whole hand… (You already know that’s FIVE!  Just say FIVE!) Hahahaha!
  • Telling my 6 year old to hold up 6 fingers and she holds up 3 fingers on each hand… LOL
  • TAPPING ME!  UGH!!! That’s the worst!  I hate when my kids come and repeatedly TAP ME!!!  (BIGGEST HUGE PET PEEVE EVER)
  • Calling me repeatedly and then saying Nevermind!
  • Or this…
  • Rude fast food worker or anyone for that matter (Especially if they are giving a service)
  • Still sucking on the straw when there is nothing else left inside and it makes that annoying gurgling sound.
  • When I’m eating and someone comes by my plate and says, “Oh that looks good!” LOL
  • When one of my kids have something and another one finds out and then says, “How they get that?”  (BY ASKING!  TRY IT!)
  • BULLIES! (Need I say more?)
  • When I vacuum and it leaves nice lines and someone walks on it for no reason.
  • People who pop up or decided to come earlier than invited.
  • Watching the same sitcom/movie over and over again.

I think that’s about it…

  • OHHH! WAIT (One more) A funky made bed with wrinkles, sleeping on a bare mattress, dirty sheets, unfresh towels…. wait… are those pet peeves or just things I don’t like?  Or is that the same? lol
Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 21 ~ Something I Miss…

Something I Miss…

That’s easy!  My youth!  As soon as I turned 30 years old, I instantly felt different.  I remembered looking in the mirror and seeing the change.  It wasn’t as if I had crows feet or wrinkles… I was just older.  My face fuller.  It didn’t droop or anything but it wasn’t as tight either.

I missed my perky breast and flatter stomach and my BIG badunkadunk!  Where did it all go!?  What happened?  And why was it replaced with another chin!  Who asked for that?  What’s with the extra meat that now hangs from my arms?

Who would have thought that at 43 I’d be telling my kids… “Back in my day I used to be something to look at!”  My mother was never this old at my age!  She’s 67 years old right now and has way more spunk and energy than I do!

I asked my mom one day… “How did you keep up with everything?  You have everything so together and in order when we were kids?”  She said, “Well in all fairness for the most part I just had two kids… you have 7 and the more babies you have the more toll it takes on your body.”  Okay.  I guess she was right because for the most part when I only had my first two kids… I was good! LOL  But the more that came, the more tired I got and they’re boys!  BIG HUGE BOYS! LOL  They are all bigger than me know and they always walk up to me and say, “Dang Ma… you’re little what are you 4’11?”  Yeah well when I turn around and punch you in the gut, you’re going to be glad I wasn’t 4’11! HAHAHAHA

Oh dear, I’m getting off topic!  What are some things you miss?

Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 20 ~ Where I Want to Be in 10 Years…

Where I Want to Be in 10 Years…

That’s easy!  At my age and in this day and age… ALIVE!

Seriously!  I want to be ALIVE.  Then after that I hope to be successful in becoming a book publisher and Author.  I’d like to have some grandkids.  But the ones who are grown and gone of course.  Well at that time my youngest will be 16… so definitely not her! lol Then I’d have a 22, 24, 26, 27, 31, 33 years old.  I hope the majority of them would be married to nice God-fearing people… The 22 and 24 year old needs to still be in college or graduating and still finding themselves. LOL

Anyway yea, that’s all.  I’m simple and not hard to please.  I just want to be able to continue on here and see my kids kids kids kids kids… You know?  HAHAHAHA

Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 19 ~ My Worst Habits…

My Worst Habits…

Well I guess I’m glad to say that I don’t have many!  I think I’m pretty good for the most part of being able to either not start something or have the willpower to quit.

  • My worst habit was smoking cigarettes.  I had been smoking since the age of 16.  I used to still my mother’s cigs from her pack and hide them around the house.  I’d hurry home from school and go to the bathroom to light up before she came home from school.  (Hmmmmmm…. that just gave me an idea for one of my characters!  I guess this blogging and challenge thing is good for something! LOL)  I have quite many times and started back since then.  I am currently now smoke free again probably going on 9-10 months?
  • This one is a bit embarrassing for me but I will share it for you guys!  *I’m hesitating…. (How much is too much info?) Hahahaha… Okay, so when I was about 6 years old, my cousin used to suck her thumb and I’d always make fun of her and mimic her.  Well don’t you know it became a habit!  My mother would try to get me to stop so many times.  She’d say, “Try another finger.  You won’t like it and then you will stop!”  Well guess what?  I did what I was told and I went down the line and it became a habit on each freaking finger!  Sad to say, I am now 43 years old and am stuck on my pinky finger.  There I’ve said it!  My step-father even tried to get me to stop by sprinkling hot sauce all over it.  I never liked hot sauce until he did that… now I love the stuff! Hahahaha!
  • I’ve never had any nail biting habit or other little quirky things that was a bad habit.  The only other thing I can think of was drinking.  I started that at a young age too.  Had many of alcoholics in my family and my mother never really like to see me drink excessively so to know worry her so much I stopped.  But late teen and young adult I could tell that it might have run in the family so yea I put a stop to it.  Besides when you truly get into church when you’re older you start to change and you tend to shed your old self like a scaly skin, if ya know what I mean.

So yeah, there ya have it!  Me at my worst!

Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 18 ~ What Am I Afraid of?

What AM I Afraid Of?

Probably the easier question would be what am I NOT afraid of.  LOL  Well to make things simple I’m going to use a list.  Here are most of the things that I am afraid of.

  • The unknown
  • Being Home alone
  • A bad report from the doctor
  • Dying
  • Losing a close loved one
  • Dentist
  • Driving at night alone
  • Driving out of town alone
  • Failure
  • Not having readers / Or people hate my books
  • Monsters
  • Open closet doors when I sleep
  • Hanging my foot off the side of the bed LOL
  • Running out of things to write about
  • Meeting new people
  • Giving speeches or sermons
  • Posting on social media in the form of reader engagement or when someone is supposed to respond but doesn’t
  • Breaking a bone
  • Getting old

That’s pretty much the just of it all… How about you?  Are what are you afraid of?

Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 17 ~ Favorite Childhood book

My Favorite Childhood Book is and was…

Caps for Sale by ESphyr Slobodkina

61ymux-jgll-_sx258_bo1204203200_

I loved this book!

capsforsale1-1024x1024

The man walked around with all these caps on his head and when he sat by a tree to take a nap all the monkeys took his caps. LOL  He had a hard time trying to get back all his caps.

WTH!!! 😀 Are there more books????????????!!!!!!!!!!

51zknmagwul51dldj0rq5l-_sx258_bo1204203200_

Looks like I’ve gots some reading to do! 😀 😀 😀

 

Posted in 31 Day Blog Challenge

Day 15 ~ Timeline of my day

Timeline of My Day…

This one varies day to day but here’s the jist of it.

  • 6:00am – Wake my teenage boys up… (Whereas they are 12, 15, 16, & 17 and should know how to wake themselves up for school but they will just keep sleeping if I don’t.)
  • 7:30am – Trying to get out of the door on time without someone having to run back in the house for something.
  • 8:00am – On my way back home
  • 8:15-9:30am – Trying to have me time with either writing, editing, or outlining, but mostly spent on social media browsing.
  • 9:30am-3:00pm – Homeschooling my 1st grader
  • 3:45pm – my 12 year old gets home and I start him on his homework and figure out dinner if I haven’t already started something in the crockpot.
  • 5:30-6pm – picking the other boys up from football practice.
  • 6-6:30pm – Taking the 17 year old to work
  • 8-9pm – If I’m lucky we might be eating dinner and getting chores done.
  • 10pm – Everyone is whining down.  If hubby is not doing homework we may watch TV and chill.  If he is, I may be crocheting, browsing social media, or hopefully getting some more writing in until I’m drifting off to sleep about ready to knock my chromebook to the floor. LOL
  • 10:30pm – Picking my son up from work (Or hubby is coming home from work and picking him up on the way.)

 


That’s in the nice world in my head… but it more or less continues on after 10pm.

  • 11:00pm – I’m going back into the boys room for the umptheenth time yelling at them to get their chores done!  I’m get a bunch of “Okaaaaaaay!”  “I’m about tooooooo!”
  • 11:30pm – I’m at it again yelling and screaming… “Nooooooowwww!”  Then when no one moves as fast as I want them too… I turn off the wifi and the house goes completely quiet… I hear… “Honey, what happened to the internet?”  (That was hubby because he was doing school work after coming home from work.) Then I hear a bunch of “What the????” “Mom! Why????”  “C’mon guys!  Get your work done!”  Then I hear a bunch of pitter patters and running and dishes clanging, and vacuums roaring.
  • “11:45pm – They all rush to me and say, “We’re done can you turn the wifi back on now?” Daddy yells, “Get your butts in bed!  You don’t need wifi to sleep!” HAHAHA!
  • 12:30am – I’m in bed drifting off (AGAIN) my 1st grader wakes me up… “Mommy wake up!  You can’t sleep because I can’t sleep because you need to read me my scripture (Psalms 91) and help me say my prayer (Matt. 6).  So as sleepy as I am… I wake up, read her scripture and prayer.  Then she says, it’s story time.  I’m like really!  Yes.  You’re right… time to read a story.  So I read her a story until she falls asleep.
  • 1:30am – I am now fully awake on my second wind… and I try to do more editing, writing, or social media browsing… LOL (Or Now my blog!)
  • 3:30am – I fall asleep again.
  • 3:45am – Hubby gets in bed and I get up to go to the bathroom… Guess what?  I’m wide awake again.  I check everyone and they’re all sleeping like babies.
  • 4:00-5:30am – I’m browsing or reading scriptures and posting something or sending something to my two grown kids to read and ponder on for when they wake up.
  • 6:00am – my alarm goes off and I go and wake the kids up and lay down because now I’m sleepy!
  • 6:10am – I wake them up again because they aren’t moving!
  • 6:15am – For some reason I’m knocked out!!! Sleeping like a baby!
  • 7:30am – They wake me up… “Mom!  We’re ready!”  But I’m not!! UGH!!!!

I know you guys don’t even have a crazy house as nearly as bad as mine!  And I know, the  reason why they won’t get up in the morning is because they stay up so late. LOL

But yeah, that’s my timeline!  Somebody pray for me! LOL

c404f815273042e678cd215f5f5f5906